Blenting through FB statusi

I invented a new word. Blent. Blog vent. Eh? You like? Today, I don't know why, I've had one-liner thoughts running through my head all day. Most of them are recently acquired annoyances. So, instead of posting 1400 statuses on Facebook in a 24 hour period, I decided to blent about them. Okay, so they're not all one liners. But I would make them one liners if I were on Facebook. Pft.

Commence blent.

1. I decided I hate listening to Eminem songs. Firstly, I would never buy any of his albums, or even any of his singles probably. He swears literally every other word. Consequently, I hate listening to his edited versions on the radio. Literally every other word is bleeped out, and I spend 3 minutes of my life listening to, "uhh *bleep*, yeah, *bleep* *bleep*, mockingbird, *bleep* you dumb *bleep* ..." stuff like that. It's so stupid. And that happened this morning. I can't get those 3 minutes back.

2. It really, REALLY bothers me when adults misspell simple words. I'm usually a stickler when it comes to grammar and spelling, but I get that there are difficult words to spell. I understand that. But when you're 60 years old, you've seen these common words every day of your life, and you STILL misspell them? One of my friends' grandmas posted a comment on her Facebook and it said, "that is so GROSE." Seriously? How many times in your 60 years of life, your 21,900 days of life, have you seen and read the word "gross" and you spell it "GROSE"?? I was so annoyed by that. If that were MY grandma....

3. I think it's hilarious when you see an old man with a see-through white shirt and you can see his dark nipples. Or when the enitre top half of his shirt is unbuttoned and you can see his dark, leathery chest and saggy boobs. I see that on a consistent basis at work. While it is disgusting and I wouldn't be sad if I never had to see that again, stuff like that screams, "I don't give a damn." And that makes me laugh.

4. I think whoever it was in Vegas who decided that doing construction on all 3 majors highways at the same time is a super big idiot. In about a 5 mile stretch on my way home from work today, the fastest I got going was 16 mph. So awesome.

5. I really miss driving a stick shift. I've driven a LOT of different cars in my ripe old age of 22, but only my first 2 were stick. And I miss it. Somebody call the wambulance.

6. Project Runway has entirely too much GAY in it. But I sit down to watch it and before I know it 6 hours has gone by. That's happened before. But tonight it was only 2.5 hours. Why is that show so addicting!

7. I feel incredibly awkward and am incredibly bothered when a guy uses "hehehe" or "teehee" or "heehee" in a text message. Or any kind of conversation whatsoever. It gives me the willies.

8. I realized today that I want my concert virginity to be stolen by a country singer. Like Taylor Swift. I would love that. I realized this when a coworker offered me 2 tickets to go see Duran Duran tomorrow night. I realized, I did not want to. I want to go to a country concert instead. Yeah.

Blenting complete. More may be added.